If you absolutely don’t have time to make your own mayonnaise, Hellmann’s Mayonnaise is the only store-bought mayonnaise that will do.
Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, itøs probably crap.
Idleness is the root of all art
Instead of buying your children all the things you never had, you should teach them all the things you were never taught. Material wears out but knowledge stays.
I won! I won! I don’t have to go to school anymore.
In a rain of dollar bills, anything can be done
In the past, we learned to cope with challenges ourselves. Today, a lot of people younger than me are not resistant to the vicissitudes and emotional challenges of life. If you’ve been told all your life that it’s the others who should spoil you and keep you free of problems, you’re probably a very sober person emotionally.
No matter how many grains of gold I serve you, you keep eating oatmeal, and I can’t become my problem.
Everything sounds deep when you don’t read books.
The ability to speak does not make you intelligent.
If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need.
I need ammunition, not a ride.
You have to take the wrinkles that come. And all those who get their skin sprayed and look like wounded warriors for a long time, become very little prettier, but look so sour. The smile is actually the best face-lift, I think.
Sometimes, the wrong train takes you to the right station.
I want to tell people how to live spiritually. After you’ve bought all your houses and clothes, you want something bigger.
One of the things I can’t get my hands on is something like “Mothers’ Clubs”, where instead of reading a book and walking in nature with their babies, they sit and talk about vomit and nappies and burping with other like-minded people and get nowhere. I think it bothers me a little in the women’s area.
When I give food to the poor, they call me a saint. When I ask why the poor have no food, they call me a communist.
You can beat 40 scholars with one fact, but you cannot beat one idiot with 40 facts.
We are not all in the same boat. We are all in the same storm.
I knew we had to drive on cobblestones, but I didn’t know they had thrown them down from a helicopter.
If the penalty for a crime is a fine, then that law only exists for the lower class.
The pill is one of the biggest advances I’ve seen.
Life is like a game of chess. I don’t know how to play chess.
Wearing cheap clothes or driving an old car doesn’t make you broke. You got a family to feed not a community to impress.
If you live for weekends or vacations, your shit is broken.